Beautifully Connected by Carmie De Leon

Mastering Your Emotional Intelligence Words by Carmie Pascual De Leon

What’s cool? Reading minds and at the same time, managing your emotions and articulating your point, in perfect moments.

Sometimes silence is the best defense. When there’s too much talk going around, it’s better to pause and discern, and hold your piece at a certain time. Until it’s most needed.

I’ve noticed many incidents when people would try to put you down either because they want you to stay with them at the bottom or they don’t feel you belong on top of them.

Many times I tried not to speak up, yet circumstances did. I’m happy because it was my personal vindicator who acted on it.

But there were more times I struggled and fought to fight for my right. Oh that’s too stressful and troublesome.

If you’re as passionate, you can relate.
This one’s for you.

Calm down. Choose your battles.
– You’ll fight and survive but most likely won’t thrive in an unhealthy environment. Where people would like to be heard and not listen to anyone, when theirs are more clever, where perfect decisions come from.

Here’s how to spot the vibe early on:

See their dominant egos:
– Authoritative
– Diplomatic
– Submissive
– Supportive
– Collaborative

I wonder why oftentimes, I see more authoritarian demeanors when they’re supposedly at the point of understanding that results are delivered thru people.

– The diplomatic here gets victimized, turned into shock absorber
– The submissive gives more power to the abusive tyrant
– The supportive gets exploited and eventually get burned out
– The collaborative won’t thrive and leave

We don’t choose to be one, we want to be the best of each of those in a given situation. But unknowingly, the kind of energy vibrates and dominates. Culture cultivated.

Know the deal – and the dealer.

The hardest. The Expert Artist.
Their verbal, body language speaks. Their eyes, hand gestures and lips express points, communicates their dismay. At some points, they completely hide it when talking to their superiors. Eventually, you’ll know their real personality and intentions. Don’t be one of them.

From the heart, comes out of their mouth.
The unexpected scenarios release unwanted words.

Watch for these, to know what spirit lives in a person:
1.) their choice of words
2.) spur of the moment words
3.) unspoken words

Read between the lines
– They rarely say thanks, no empathy
– They don’t say apologies, no courtesy
– No reaction on major items, no concern
– They play faves, they blame others

Manage your stressor.

– Be in the moment, know your work and structure your style when dealing, speaking and working with them, without losing your values and dignity. Pray. Paint if you can. Be the better one.
– Build the business by striking the best balance between firmness and kindness. Cultivate the spirit of camaraderie by being professionally proactive, courteous and respectful, regardless of their rudeness and workplace chaos.
– Set realistic expectations, emotionally and career- wise. Remember, not all people can be like you, in terms of skills, passion, loyalty or commitment. Not all can find it simple to lift other people. But set timelines, either you change the culture or you become one of them. Your choice. Act on it, with timelines.
– Stay on top, remind yourself of equality. Assert and speak your mind because you’re not to be bullied, nor to create conflict or complicate situations but there must be someone to clean the air. If it’s you, it’s up to you. Be part of the solution. No drama, simply lay out biz solutions. Talk it out and move on. You’re all in one boat, in one direction and all you can do for now is to do your job by voicing out.
– Focus and hold on to your core. Nothing beats success. Focus on what you do well. Believe in your worth, look people in the eye and lift them high. Embrace the authentic and model the right way.
– Stay #BeautifullyConnected. Invest in meaningful relationships without putting any soul down. We think, talk, and live differently.